Sometimes you can prevent misbehavior simply by changing the environment, for example, by "childproofing" the setting. Look around your house to see if there's anything that might cause your child to misbehave. Remember, the house is as much the child's home as it is yours.
If you make an effort to reduce situations that have some element of danger to a child or to property, you can eliminate a good number of behavior problems. For example, if a valuable or breakable or dangerous object is the source of curiosity for the child, move it to a higher place. Not only will you avoid the need to scold or restrain the child, but you will also lessen the child's frustration, your frustration, and probably your anger.
Sometimes a parent will say that children must learn to handle themselves around breakable or dangerous objects. Yes, eventually. But, please remember that young children do not yet have the coordination necessary to maneuver their bodies as you can. They don't have those arms and legs and fingers working together yet. And they should not be expected to do something they are incapable of doing. When they get a little older, they will be able to maneuver better.
For infants and toddlers, changing the environment means childproofing the home. Put anything that is breakable, valuable, or dangerous out of reach. Childproofing the home allows the child to learn about all the interesting things around him and frees the parent from constant "no- no's" and hand slaps.
Children at this age have a tremendous urge to explore their world, to learn about their world by touching and tasting everything they can get their hands on. It is perfectly normal for a nine-month-old child to put everything in her mouth. She picks up dirt on the floor and tastes it; she lifts and feels the lamp; and she pulls all the towels off the shelf. You can prevent these incidents by keeping the floor clean, placing the lamp out of reach, locking the linen closet, and getting some safe things for her to bang and chew on. This not only keeps the child from being frustrated, but is a reasonable action for safety reasons as well.
Some parents refuse to childproof the home. They worry about what their neighbors will say. They think they must teach the child not to bother things. But they are just making life miserable for themselves and the child. Toddlerhood is the time for exploration. Once the child can talk and understand language, then you can teach him to respect your property.
Ask yourself, "What in our home makes it hard for my child to behave? Does she have shelves or boxes to store her toys? Are hooks placed low so that she can hang up her coat by herself? Do we have a safe place for play outside? Does my child have a chance to play with other children?"
Changing the setting means making it easy for the child, such as providing a place to keep his toys, interesting things to play with, and places he can play without worrying his parents. It means, for example, providing wide, heavy-bottom plastic glasses that won't break or tip over easily so that milk isn't spilled at every meal.
Changing the setting is often a hassle-free way to prevent misbehavior.
Boredom is one of the leading causes of misbehavior. Providing interesting playthings for the child prevents boredom. Children involved in play don't have the time or the need to whine, to say, "What can I do now?" or to annoy baby brother.
Playthings need not be expensive. Often babies would rather play with pots and pans than with an expensive store-bought toy. Many creative toys can be made from household items, for example:
Ronald L. Pitzer
Extension Family Sociologist