Understanding Young Children

A Brush-up on Basics

For the caring—and sometimes despairing—parent, child care provider, teacher, or other caregiver, here is a list of traits common to the preschool through third-grade child. This "brush-up on basics" can help you understand children for what they are and what they can become. This understanding is the best tool for preparing children to live a happy and successful life.

• The child is very egocentric. Right now, he thinks in terms of "me" and "mine" as he establishes himself as a person. Later he will think in terms of a family and understand the meaning of "love thy neighbor." Parents and teachers should be careful listeners, praise the child when possible, and avoid suppressing the child's individuality.

• The child wants to feel big, proud, and important. She wants success because she experiences failure so often. But she needs your patience and support while she continues to try. Small successes deserve large rewards of love and attention. There should be no single, correct answers in the world of a young child; there should be many choices of activities, challenges, and tasks.

• The child is a beginner—an amateur. He makes mistakes. He forgets instructions. He's noisy. But he still has plenty of time to learn. Give him enough time and room to make mistakes; he will learn by them for years to come.

• The child is tender. She has very few resources of her own at first. She's still feeling her way through life with limited abilities. She depends heavily on love. Don't offer her a harsh setting. Don't expose her to rejection. Schools and homes should be warm, tender, affectionate, and accepting.

• The young child needs stimulation. Allow him to use his natural curiosity as a way to learn. He needs an environment that provides a variety of experiences. Give him sufficient wandering space filled with choices that involve the five senses. Don't let television occupy a very large place in his life.

• The child is not a good sitter. She should seldom be made to sit for a long period. Introduce her to blocks, playhouses, climbing bars, manipulative toys—anything that allows her to explore and learn.

• The young child is not good at keeping quiet. At this early age, silence is not golden. Somewhere in the midst of the endless questions and confusion, understanding will occur.

  Adults will be better parents and teachers if they realize the child's world is a very special place—mysterious and exciting, confusing yet complete. If parents, child care providers, teachers, and other caregivers will observe the outside world from time to time through a child's eyes, understanding and realistic expectations will ensure success.

Ronald L. Pitzer
Extension Family Sociologist

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