Stress, or feeling nervous can happen when you experience something that upsets your own or your family's life. You can't always get rid of the sources of stress in your life. Yet, there are things you can do to better cope with nervousness in your life or the life of people you care about.

TOOLS TO RECOGNIZE STRESS, ANXIETY AND DEPRESSION

First, you need to recognize that you or others are stressed and that can affect how you behave. Just as a flashing red light in your dashboard warns that something is wrong with the car's engine, we all display warning signs when we experience stress. There are physical signs such as:

• sleepiness or sleeplessness
• headaches
• fatigue

You can also watch for signs in your family. Symptoms might show up as frequent fights or arguments, communication breakdowns, greater anger, lack of patience, or frequent criticism of others. Deeper problems may show up as alcohol or drug abuse, depression or physical abuse and hitting.

The second step is to identify the source. This is sometimes easier said than done. Like the dog that is kicked by the little boy, who was yelled at by his sister, who was criticized by her mother, it is sometimes difficult to find the cause.

HOW TO TAKE ACTION

You may believe that you and the people you care about are at the mercy of what happens to you. However, there are at least four actions you can take:

• First, you can control some of the things that are happening. For example, you can say no to extra commitments or plan to not buy something when a job layoff looks possible.
• Second, you can control the way that you look at your situation. For example, a financial emergency can be looked at as ruining a trip to see grandparents or as an opportunity for the family to relax and enjoy one another at home.
• Third, don't rely on substances such as tobacco, caffeine or drugs. Instead, try to exercise and practice relaxation.
• Fourth, you can get help. Strong families and individuals recognize that sometimes stress is too serious to handle alone. Turning to your friends, family, and community services such as your church, employee assistance program or a community agency that offers counseling, can help.

University of Minnesota Extension Home Page

Copyright ©  1998  Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved.