Stop Letting It "Bug" You

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Sometimes it is the little things that bug us the most. If we can place the irritant in a different frame of reference, it might not bother us to the same extent. Some researchers call this changing the definition of the situation. Others encourage us to re-frame the situation.

For example, an older woman was awakened several times a week by the noise of her garbage being loaded into the truck. This occurred prior to 7 a.m. beside her bedroom window. She got so worked up that she was unable to return to sleep and often spent the remainder of the day angry. She believed that she had earned the right to sleep to 8 a.m. because of 60 years of hard work.

One day during the winter, the temperature was well below zero and the wind sounded bitterly cold. She again was awakened by the noise of the garbage truck compacting all of the garbage. This time she felt very grateful that someone else had to be out in the bitter cold and that she could stay comfortable in her own warm bed. From that day on, she seldom awoke or even heard the garbage truck.

This woman had looked at an irritating situation from a totally different perspective and found that her reaction was drastically different. Some situations really can be re-framed and result in much less stress or anger to the person.

Sue Meyers
Family Sociologist

Origninally published in December 1982

College of Human Ecology in cooperation with the University of Minnesota Extension Service

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