Thrive With Your Teen
Rose Allen
Parent's behaviors can motivate teens, and it is good to talk with your teen about important values. Following are values to demonstrate and communicate with your teenager:
- Be clear about rules and why you have them.
- Not everything has to become a discussion or problem. Choose your battles.
- Have negotiable and non negotiable rules. (non negotiable rules are those that involve the physical safety and emotinal and mental wellbeing of your teen and the core family values)
- Teach respect by being respectful. Always model the behavior.
- Listen to your teen's hopes and dreams.
- Explain why you don't want your teen to smoke, drink, use drugs, or have sex.
- Teach teens to stand up for themselves without hurting others.
- Listen instead of lecturing.
- Help them learn from their mistakes.
- Compliment your teens and acknowledge the good things they do. Pointing out the good things is the best way to prevent bad behavior.
- Connect them to their cultural and family roots.
- Make sure they help around the house.
- Encourage them to contribute to the community.
- Let teens know you expect the best from them.
- Have fun together.
- Teach respect for privacy.
- It's okay when you disagree. This is how teens learn to think for themselves. See conflicts as something positive where they are learning to express themselves.
- Expect them to be part of family activities.
- Don't take it personally, remember they are teens and are growing up.
- Let them know and feel that you will always be there for them, no matter what happens.
- Let them know that you love them by telling them so.
Never give up. Your teen needs you more than ever! For more information, listen to people in the community whom you respect. Also, for additional resources visit the Families with Teens website at /family/families-with-teens/.
